Sleeping with your eyes open

Some people can. My four year-old little man can. I admit, it happens to me.

It is a phenomenon which occurs, as best I can tell, from extreme exhaustion. Strange to think that a person can be so tired, the eyelids do not succome to gravity.

The times I feel the worst about being worn out, is during reading time with the kids at night. I’ll be reading along, then feel it coming. The wave of unconsciousness hits you across your face while your eyes are still open. Sheer will keeps words coming out of my mouth as my subconsous reads and does it’s most primitively level of thinking.

As I write this, I have caught myself going cross0eyed and have shaken it off several times. I’m not feeling that weird warm “up for twenty-four + hours, ok.  Going to have my stuff together tomorrow,

Good night



Something light, and yellow

A first attempt at long distance blogging.

Wanted to have a way of writing that would be as close to sleeping position as possible. This way, I can justify calling it rest time as well. I’m approaching 10% of the goal, and wondering if my blog has a theme. If it does, this post is my “yellow submarine” post. 

Feeling a bit more artistic, and couldn’t help but take this second shot.

Really would rather spend time writing, thinking, reading, and playing with the kids tomorrow, but need to rest for another early morning. 

Not in the mood to think – but had a fun time.

“We all live in a yellow submarine, a yellow submarine, a yellow submarine.”




Playing with nothing to loose

We may fool ourselves with the notion that “He with the most toys, wins”. Seems that 15 years or so ago, this was a trendy auto sticker. I cannot say with abosolute truth that this is against God’s word, but I’m going out on a limb, and going with… probably. The popular rebuttal to the notion of life’s winner, was “He with the most toys, still dies”. Undoubtedly so, however still missing the point to some degree.

The truth is that all we have is borrowed. Our talent is on loan, our toys are on loan, and every breath we take is not without the blessing of He who put us here. We may try to take credit for things that we are pleased with in our life. We surely shy away from bearing responsibility of those things that bring us shame. 

This said, if we give it ALL to him – we have nothing to loose. A pretty good feeling.

Good night


More Talent on Loan

This topic has been sitting in my draft folder since my original Talent on Loan post. This is my best attempt of finishing the thoughts as they were coming in-

We as mere mortals, have a penchant for worshiping intellect, beauty, athletic ability, or other outwardly observable gifts natural skill which we do not possess. The fortunate few in the public spotlight must be wary not to give in to the idea of actually being worshiped by the masses for attributes they had no part of creating. I find myself among those unburdened with such acknowledged natural talent, but catch myself coveting my more fortunate neighbor all too often.

A great quote I read recently on Napoleon Bonepart explaining his hubris, went something like “Napoleon – a self-made man who worshiped his creator.”

Enviable characteristics come to those blessed few the same way the rest of us are granted the most basic physical attributes such as hair, fingers, toes etc. Bo Jackson is a perfect example of a man whose incredible athletic ability matched so well the sports he was introduced to. In his time in professional sports, there was no earthly equal. There could be an argument whether there ever was or will be a specimen of such pure natural athletic talent. But over-acknowledgement of the recipient of natural gift can miss the point in a dramatic way. Where do these gifts come from, and are we giving Him the credit due?

Give thanks in all things, and give God the glory He deserves.


Funny Little Bunny

Moments like this are why I am so happy for this blog project. I don’t want to forget today.

It’s early morning, and my Funny Little Bunny tip-toed down the stairs. I could tell by the time on the clock, it was most likely a bad dream. Fully expecting to hear my little Bunny begin whispering a wake up call to my dozing Bride, I heard nothing. As more moments passed, I began to wonder where she had ended up. To my joy, she had come directly to my side of the bed to seek comfort in her moment of need.

Again, days like this, I don’t want to forget. All the tears, all the mistakes, all the missed opportunities are wiped away and we are identified as fully competent, ultimate fixers and providers of pure comfort. Are my kids delusional, or what! 🙂

Today was a day planned to be at work an hour early. Like so much of life, not quite what I had planned, but nowhere in the world I’d rather be. Cuddling this little Bunny, easing her mind, and taking it as it comes.

As my Bunny headed back up to bed, I couldn’t help feel a sense of accomplishment when she went straight back to bed – without a stop by the other side of the bed. The little one knows Mom is there, but Dad is just what she needed in this moment. I feel my first hashtag.



Are you Kinder than a 5th grader?

Some lessons are taught best by those unburdened by age, experience, and perilous “knowledge” of life and our expertise of it. While it is our duty as parents to train our children, why do we end up learning so much from them? 

Forgiveness: the one lesson I keep having to learn the hard way from my little ones. Why are they so quick to forgive me? There are times when I should thank my children on the hour for giving me a pass on poor behavior. It is a reflection from below, as we see from above. We are continually forgiven by our children as we are by our Father in Heaven. More often than not, we are deserving of neither.

This wonderful gift is just that – a gift. One that should not be taken advantage of. I pray that I do not abuse the forgiveness of those below, around, or He who is above.


Death, Taxes, and Leslie Nielsen

It’s days like today that I’m glad I don’t have hyperthymesia. Although having total recall for every detail in one’s life may be incredibly useful, I am glad that my memory of a favorite little book only went so far.

There are few sure things in life. I can tell you in no uncertain terms that if I pick up Leslie Nielsen’s Stupid Little Golf Book, I’m going to laugh. Something about the parody in this book drives pure sophomoric joy into my heart. The art of encouraging the average golfer to magnify the bad habits he so desperately works to eliminate in his quest to become a better player.

It’s good to remember that this book will make me laugh, but it’s good to not completely remember what’s coming. Picking this book up today, I new I would laugh but forgot how hard I would cry.

So welcome to Dear ol’ Dad’s Book Club and our first recommendation for the year. Even Amazon reviews confirm a great read for non-golfers.



There are days

It was a Monday. Got home late, but got lots done at work. Feels good, but bitter-sweet.

Watched a show with the kids, and felt encouraged as a Dad. We ate my daughters first checkerboard cake. So thankful they waited for me.

My duck jerky is in the oven now – almost done. Need to check Jamie’s hair that I didn’t have time for this morning. Snuck some candy before writing this, and shouldn’t have. Thinking about getting some more.

Want to be asleep, but will find a second wind – 

Wishing I had snapped a photo of my first can of boiled peanuts in the blind Sarurday. 

Oldest just came down to say she loves me. Second wind officially caught!

Loving this!


Go Broncos!

Watching the Broncos flop in multiple Super Bowl appearances taught me a few things. An early experiment of emotional investment. My kids are now the age I was then. 

After the letdown of one of the several losses, I remember looking at the situation from the outside. It was a deep level of stress that could be totally avoidable, it seemed.

I don’t invest much in sports teams, but I do enjoy watching them in the moment. Broncos and Patriots played a great game, with Denver coming out on top and winning the AFC. Carolina completely destroyed Arizona to take the NFC title. It’s a strange matchup emotionally for me this year – we have now been in North Carolina for 6 months, and are really making it home.

So two home teams, but still have a little place in my heart for the Orange and Blue.

Go Broncos!